NoFap Can't Get Past A Week
Are you struggling to get past 7 days on NoFap?
Perhaps you're stuck in a relapse cycle and right now your journey is looking something like this…
- You go three days – then you relapse…
- Then you relapse the day after that as well…
- Then you go two days – and you relapse…
- Then you're stuck in a relapse cycle for 3 days…
- Then you go 5 days – then you have another relapse…
- And then you have another bingeing fest for a few days after that relapse
Well, first of all, let me tell you that you're not alone. Thousands of other men are in that exact situation.
So, let's take a look at what I would recommend you doing…
How to get past 7 days on NoFap…
Right now you do not trust yourself
Objective: regain trust by building small wins…
The problem with relapsing that often is that you lose trust in yourself.
You see, you're brain is going to look back at your “track record” and when it sees all those frequent relapses it gives you zero confidence in your ability to do a longer streak, like for example 90 days.
That's kind of understandable because, well, would you trust a friend who repeatedly says he'll do something for you, but he then he always breaks his promise?
It's the exact same way with yourself…
…if you repeatedly break your own intentions, you lose trust in yourself!
Once you lose trust in yourself – you're in bad shape…
Not trusting yourself means that you now have an identity of that of a person who breaks his own promises.
And pay attention here because this is very important:
It is so important that, if you only get one thing out of this article it should be this…
Your identity is the core driver of your actions in life. That's right. The strongest force in the human personality is the need to stay consistent with how we define ourselves!
What does that mean?
This means that if you have an identity of that of a person who breaks his own promises then you won't think twice about doing so again, because hey, that's just in line with what such a person would do.
Changing your identity!
Here's the solution…
You have to change your identity.
You have to become a man that does what he sets out to do.
If you can't even go a week right now then you have to shorten your time frame.
Well, the reason is simple: you have to start by setting intentions that are so small that you won't break them.
Start by setting microscopic goals – and build from there…
If you have trouble getting past 7 days on NoFap then you could for example set a goal of just doing NoFap for 3 days.
Then, once you reach day 3, you can fap if you feel like it.
This way your chances of actually reaching your goal are pretty high. Even if you're hopeless, achieving a 3 day goal is actually very doable and much more likely than you achieving a 90 day goal.
Now some of you are going to say…
“But hey, how can you even say that? We shouldn't aim for such a short streak… 3 days does nothing good and what kind of message are we giving ourselves if we on top of that give ourselves permission to fap after 3 days? 90 days is my goal and I'm sticking to it”
Well, then I could reply to you by saying; ok, so how's that working out for you?
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The 3 day goal is just a a start…
Of course the 3 day goal is not going to be your end game. It's your first small win.
You see, if you want to get out of the relapse cycle you can't keep breaking your intentions any longer. And if you set a goal of 3 days and you happen fap to porn on day 4, you haven't broken your intentions.
That's great, you now have a win!
Again, you need to be stacking up those win so that you can start trusting yourself again.
Slowly build up…
Okay, so let's say you fapped for 2 days after you reached your 3 day goal.
No problem, that's totally fine! But after that it's time to go at it again and perhaps now you set a goal of reaching 5 days?
Not a bad idea, because chances are you'll be able to make it, and guess what, now you actually have another win under your belt.
Keep stacking your wins up like this, no matter how seemingly small steps you have to take. Think: progress over perfection!
Aim – win – build identity – aim – win – build identity – aim – win – build identity… etc.
To make it easier for you, here are some additional tips…
Limit your phone and internet use…
If you are struggling with relapses and you have trouble going one full week, it's absolutely crucial that you limit your phone and internet use.
In fact, this is something that most people have to do in order to be successful on NoFap. Yes, even those how frequently can go 14 days or so.
You're willpower won't last…
Internet is full of triggers and if you spend your whole day online you're asking for trouble.
You see, your willpower works like a muscle, meaning; it get's tired…
If you run into a trigger at the end of the day, when you have very little left in your “willpower bank”, you're almost guaranteed to relapse.
I highly recommend taking a time out from being online the last 2-3 hours leading up to your bedtime…
Yeah, I know it sucks, but hey, you do wanna get past that 7 day hurdle, right?
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Get rid of social media for a month
I also recommend you take a complete break from social media for a month.
YouTube is ok, but things like Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat are minefields when it comes to triggers.
It's impossible to spend time over there without running into pictures of fitness models, booty shaking clips or kind of triggering meme etc.
In addition to this, think about what happens to your state when you're using social media…
You get into this automatic “following mode”, where you just aimlessly get dragged along by what's presented to you. Click – follow – click follow….recognize that mode? That's right, it's the same mode you're in when you're relapsing to porn. So, by going on social media and putting yourself in that state, it's like you already have one foot in the relapsing door.
I hope that make sense.
Commit to yourself to give up all social media for at least one month.
And oh, that goes for dating apps as well!
If you're serious about rebooting and you really want to stop relapsing then get the hell off Tinder and don't look back…
…for 30 days, at least.
Work on other goals
It is also extremely important that you have other goals, besides building a good NoFap streak, that you keep working on.
Sure you want to avoid relapses, but only building a life around things you want to avoid is not that productive.
So you want to have other goals as well.
Goals that you move towards, like for example…
- Could you improve your body in some way? (maybe lose a bit of weight or gain a bit of muscle)
- Could you sing up for a night class and learn something new?
- How about starting a small side business? ( it doesn't have to be up and running right away – but you can always take the first step)
- Could you sharpen your social skills a bit?
- How about overcoming your fear of talking to girls?
- Ever wished you could play a musical instrument?
…well, now's you're chance!
Pick something and keep working on it while you keep trudging forward on your lovely NoFap journey. But, on the other hand, don't overload yourself with too much either because that is also a recipe for disaster. Keep it balanced.
I hope you found this article informative.
Start implementing the things I talked about and you will notice some good results.
However, if you still feel like you can't overcome your relapses and you need someone to hold your hand, then I highly recommend you go read a blog post where I talk about a good online course for quitting porn.
It's created by a licensed therapist and it produces absolutely phenomenal results.
Or, take a look at my blog post NoFap – How to stop relapsing forever (10 Easy Tips)
I'm sure you'll find it helpful.