NoFap And Dating / Dating Apps
Take a look at the video below to discover if dating apps is a “no go” on your NoFap journey…
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Make sure to both watch the video as well as read the article, as the compliment each other.
The Dangers of Using Dating Apps During NoFap…
Let's get one thing straight right from the start:
…using dating apps during NoFap is not a problem for everyone.
However, a lot of guys do find dating apps to be a huge trigger, drastically increasing their relapse frequency.
To make it as easy as possible for you, you basically have four things to consider here…
- If dating apps do do not increase your relapse, feel free to use them.
However, moderation is still advisable (look for the subheading further down, “Dating apps role on dopamine and your pmo recovery”)
- If dating apps significantly increase your relapses – don't use them!
Some guys just relapse right away if trying to use dating apps. If this is you, just say no.
- If dating apps somewhat increase your relapse risk, you can train yourself to become more mindful.
If you somewhat have control, but still find yourself relapsing a bit more often when using dating apps, train yourself to become more conscious to eliminating “drifting” and thus avoid relapses (as talked about in the video).
Dating apps and their role on dopamine and your PMO recovery…
Since dating apps are dopamine driven, some of you are probably wondering about the effects they may have on your brain and your pmo recovery.
It's a good question…
Can dating apps slow down your recovery even if you manage to stay away from relapses?
The short answer: maybe if you overdo it.
If you spend too much time swiping it could perhaps prevent your dopamine system to fully recover.
How much is too much, then?
Well, there are no set in stone rules here. But I can tell you how I prevented overusing Tinder myself, back when I was rebooting.
Solution: use the free version of Tinder. That way you only get a limited amount of swipes per day.
This is probably nowhere near enough swipes to desensitize you, which is good. On the other hand, if you use the paid version or some other app where you get basically unlimited amounts of swipes, then the risk of over-stimulation instantly increases. Especially if you live in a big city with thousands of Tinder users.
Smart Tinder use could potentially even help you…
If you use Tinder, or some other dating app during your NoFap journey, it could even be helpful for overcoming your porn addiction…
…IF you use it in a smart way, that is!
With moderate, conscious use, where you commit to stay highly mindful, those “semi triggering” images could potentially help your prefrontal cortex to become stronger (the PFC, is the part of your brain that is responsible for self control).
Keep reading to learn why this is…
Just seeing some hot pixels is not the same as intentionally seeking it out…
Indeed, being able to come across some beautiful images without escalating or resorting to porn is actually making you better equipped to be able to handle real triggers in the future.
However, note that this is only applicable as long as you just happen to come across some nice looking stuff while pursuing some other goal. Like for example when looking for a date on the dating app, or when searching and working on some other project online.
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Be smart about it…
Be smart about this, and don't use the above lines as an excuse to start doing stupid stuff. Like searching for hot stuff trying to justify it with “but I just have to find out *insert pathetic excuse here* …”
If you intentionally seek out hot images, then you are actually making yourself weaker, not stronger.
If you intentionally search for “hot stuff” just to try to draw some lust from it, then it's another matter because then you are actually feeding your addiction. Which is a big no no!
Are you ready to date in the first place?
Hint: binge relapsing = probably not!
If you have been rebooting for some time, but you recently fell down and now you're stuck in a relapse cycle then I would recommend that you put your dating on hold for a while.
The same goes if you just started your NoFap journey and you haven't been able to go even 2 weeks clean yet.
How long should you wait until you can start dating?
Of course it's up to you, but I would seriously recommend that you wait until you are at least 2-3 weeks clean.
2-3 weeks or perhaps even a bit longer.
Well, if you're stuck in a relapse cycle right now then all those porn flashbacks are inevitable going to spin around in your head whenever you are close to a woman.
These flashbacks can be pretty nasty and spin around to such a degree that they would probably prevent you from seeing the real person there. And thus your date wouldn't really be that fulfilling.
It wouldn't really be fait to her either.
I speak from experience here and I really have to say that everything gets som much better when you've been clean for more than a month.
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NoFap And Dating / Dating Apps
Ok, so there you have it.
I hope this blog post gave you some clarity.
If you can handle dating apps without instantly going on full “jizz mode” then by all means, use them. But if you do, remember to use them in moderation as they, just like social media in general, is highly dopamine driven. And we do not want to overtax our, already, heavily taxed dopamine system.
Also, always stay mindful and super aware in order to avoid drifting.
Never start drifting, because when you drift, you already have one foot in the relapsing door.
Do this, and you'll be fine.
P.S. Need my help with rebooting? If so, click here to go to my contact page and see what kind of help I'm currently offering.
P.P.S. Did you watch the video at the top of the page? If you liked it, and you would like to see more of my content, then you can check out my YouTube channel right here.
- Does NoFap really make you more attractive? (NoFap study)
- Feeling Lonely on NoFap (Here's Why That's a Good Thing)
- NoFap and magnetic attraction (Myth or reality)