Does NoFap Really Make You More Attractive?
So, does NoFap really make you more attractive or is that just something that guys like to tell themselves, kind of like that phenomenon when everyone is absolutely convinced that their diet is the healthiest and best one?
Well, today we are going to take a deeper dive into this.
We're going to look at what guys are experiencing, their theories about it, and then I'm also going to give my take on what could be going on.
First, let's start by looking at a poll I asked my subscribers on my YouTube channel Project Stronger Self.
Do you feel NoFap has made you more attractive – and do people notice?
Results from a poll…
I asked the question, o you feel NoFap has made you more attractive? And do people notice?
Here's is how they answered…
More than 3200 people responded and this is how they voted in the poll…
- No, I don't think so: 23%
- Well, yes, because it's a habit that leads to other good habits: 12%
- Yes, because it increases confidence, and people pick up on that: 15%
- Yes, It's a combination of the above 2 things: 16%
- Yes. I think retention itself does something to your ‘energy': 33%
By the way, if you find polls like this interesting, then make sure to subscribe to my YouTube channel by clicking here, as over there I frequently make videos where I present similar polls like this one. I also talk a lot about NoFap and quitting porn in general.
What guys are saying about NoFap and attractiveness…
Let's take a look at a few comments from guys who participated in the poll (source here).
“I actually become more attractive. PMO to me causes severe tiredness and fatigue which manifests as “droopy”, tired eyes, black circles around my eyes and uneven upper eyelids. My posture also takes a hit, as well as my voice; it becomes a higher pitch and cracks often.
All of the other psychological symptoms (social anxiety, depression etc) are of course present.” -sstyloideuss-
“It's funny how I look in the mirror and see the same guy. However being on semen retention for 43 days has caused the same women at the gym to look at me differently. It definitely make you more attractive.” -Henry Womack-
“I stopped smoking by going hard mode, confidence level through the roof. More motivation to workout because I have so much energy. I started to realize problems I had with myself and started to face them head on. The way I talk walk act is completely different. My baby moms actually noticed the difference as well and was telling me everything she sees. I been noticing female attraction is a lot more consistent as well as eye contact and assertiveness.” -Isaiah Caceres-
“For me at day 57 on no fap its a combination of retention itself doing something to my energy, which in turn I've picked up other good habits like starting to work out, eating better. Which in turn is increasing my confidence because I'm not fapping. I've noticed female attraction as well as in general people seem to respect me more. I recently out of the blue I had someone tell me that I had a certain glow about me, it was really random.” -Zachery Pack-
“I think it also just makes you more aware so you pick up on people checking you out. +confidence +energy”. -Jake Schneider-
“Honestly when I started No Fap I found myself being way more confident talking to girls. I also memorize the school lessons a lot easier. I can defiantly say it has a positive impact on me.” -Joygulplay-
“After doing nofap for around 3-5 weeks I noticed that more girls start checking me, and that's maybe to the fact that I was more comfortable holding long eye contact, and feeling confident to be myself and not giving a damn about what people think about me.” -Night Wolf-
“Been practicing it for 6 months. Female attraction-increased severely. Respect from others -increased. Muscle growth increased. Depression-gone. I thought it was placebo, got to try it coz had no other choice, 25 y. o – had no girl friend, no respect from people, no hope for future. Now I'm confident as fuck, having real intimacy with females, and feel good about my future.” -кажется мир замер-
NoFap will often lead to other good habits as well =>This can affect attractiveness!
There is one thing you need to realize about NoFap.
It is a keystone habit, that more often than not, also leads to other good habits in life.
It's very common to see guys who are doing NoFap also start eating healthier, doing more physical exercise, working on their goals and growing as a person. Now, since your outer appearance is highly reflective of your lifestyle, then naturally your new way of living is going to improve your looks as well.
Why does NoFap lead to other good habits?
There might be several reasons for this, but I can instantly point to two major reasons…
- NoFap trains you to be less prone to go for instant gratification.
- NoFap makes your dopamine system function better, and dopamine is the key driver behind motivation.
When you stop hammering your brains reward system with all those super stimulating porn sites, your brain will become more sensitive to whatever dopamine it makes.
This is good because it means that you then start needing less stimuli in order to feel excited. As a results, doing things that you used to think was boring, like for example working on your goals, is suddenly much more interesting and enriching. This will make in easier to excel in pretty much every area of your life. And once you do, obviously people will start noticing.
Can you “porn yourself” into becoming more of a ‘beta' male?
Fapping to porn is so stimulating for the brains reward system that, if doing it too much and too often, the brain will start down-regulating its dopamine receptors.
Dopamine receptors are small sots that dopamine itself locks on to, in order for it to do its job. This, ‘down-regulation' process is a desperate attempt the brain is doing in order to protect itself from all that abnormally high stimulation.
The interesting thing to note here is that…
- Research has shown that those small dopamine D2 receptors also affect our personality. Studies on both animals and humans have shown that having less dopamine receptors is correlates to more social avoidance, being more timid and submissive. (See related article: Does NoFap change your personality).
- While individuals who are more willing to take social risks, are more ‘dominant' and have higher status have more of those small dopamine D2 receptors. In the animal kingdom, those who are higher up in the dominance hierarchy have more dopamine receptors. And, indeed, studies have shown that people with higher social status have more of siad dopamine D2 receptors.
Which one of those two groups do you think would be perceived as more ‘attractive'?
Well, it's obviously the latter group, as it's a well known fact that people like confidence. Confidence and decisiveness are attractive traits.
This could very well explain why people who go on a NoFap journey often start feeling much more ‘alpha' than what they used to feel back when they were fapping to adult sites, several times a week.
Increased self-respect is another common benefit on NoFap
A lot of guys are also reporting how they suddenly start getting more respect from others when doing NoFap.
I believe the reason for this is pretty simple.
If guys are successful at their attempt to give up porn and learn how to master their urges, which to be honest is a very difficult skill, they gain a lot of self respect.
Well, here too, just like with the confidence we talked about, self respect is an attractive trait. If YOU respect yourself more, other people will also respect you more. It's almost like the social world is a mirror of your self-esteem.
Does NoFap do something to your “energy” that women, or people in general, can pick up on?
As you could see from the poll at the top of the page, a lot of guys also think that semen retention itself does something to their ‘energy'. And that, somehow, people around them can pick up on that energy.
This, however, is something that's a lot harder to explain.
I must confess that I've always had a pretty hard time with terms like, “it increases your vibration” or “you're radiating energy” because, even if there's something like that going on, no one knows how that works.
Statements like, “it increases your vibration” simply can not be backed up by any concrete evidence….
…so, if I were to ask them, “ok, show me some evidence on how I'm suddenly ‘vibrating' more then!”...
…not one single person on the planet would be able to do so.
It might still be true…
Now, just because I have a bit of a hard time swallowing the energy thing, doesn't mean I'm discarding it!
No, I simply said that it makes me cringe a bit, and I have a hard time with the term.
Do women pick up on some form of energy or not?
Maybe…I simply do not know. No one knows.
At heart, I remain an open individual and I'm fully aware of the fact that there must be thousands of things we do not yet understand in this world.
Biology has made us very responsive to the opposite sex…
We do know that humans have many interesting ways of responding to the opposite sex, that are happening without us even knowing. Like for example, studies have shown that if a man smells the tears of a woman, his testosterone levels suddenly drops. At the same time, if you were to ask any man, he would say that he didn't even have any idea that tears could smell.
It's clear that mother nature has made us very reactive in a biological sense. Perhaps it wouldn't bee that far fetched, then, to think that women could also somehow, unconsciously, pick up some form of vibes if a man is walking around with a “loaded gun” in his pants? Something worth pondering, right there.
Mirror neurons could be one more explanation…
This one is easier to understand.
As I said, when guys give up fapping to porn the, they reverse the desensitization of their reward system and thus they start to find real life women more attractive.
How does this happen?
Well, think about it…
…it's quite simple, really.
During one single porn session you can see more hot babes than your cavemen ansestors could do in several lifetimes. If you constantly keep bombarding your brain with hundreds of super hot porn stars online, who all have their female attributes magnified, then obviously just seeing a normal looking girl at the grocery store will not do that much for you. And it's not just the ‘attributes', but even more so, the endless novelty.
On the other hand, let's say you were to live isolated on a small island somewhere in the pacific ocean, without internet and without seeing one single person for 3 years. Then one day a small sailing boat shows up and a girl jumps down on the beach. It's just a normal looking girl, in fact, she's a bit overweight, but when she smiles at you would feel a huge dopamine rush with all kinds of butterflies in your stomach….Food taste better after you've been fasting.
Enter, HER mirror neurons…
Now, the thing is, we have these so called mirror neurons in our brain. These can fire and make us react or have the same emotion as the person we are looking at is having.
Well, if the NoFap guy then start noticing normal looking girls, after giving up porn, and he starts feeling much more attracted to them, perhaps their mirror neurons will start firing making them more interested in the NoFap guy as well.
These mirror neurons are not just some woo-woo term, but they are actually a real thing. For example, have you ever felt a peng of pain in your foot when watching a YouTube clip where a guy in the gym drops a 45 pound plate on his bear foot, or something similar? Well, there you go, mirror neurons in action, right there.
This could be just another way to explain what some guys mean when they say, “it increase my vibration, or energy, and women pick up on that”
By the way, interesting fact: Research has shown that psychopaths have an impaired mirror neuron system. That would explain the lack of empathy and the seemingly horrific way they act at times.
Does NoFap Really Make You More Attractive?
It's very clear that many guys start experiencing a lot more attention from both other males and the opposite sex when doing NoFap. In fact, so much so that having a debate on that would be pretty fruitless.
What's more interesting is why this happens.
Is it just the improved confidence and the implementations of other good lifestyle habits that makes the NoFapper grow as a person and start standing out more?
Is it just the fact that guys start noticing others more, and thus they suddenly notice how they are noticed…
…or, could there be something more mysterious energy at play here?
One thing's for sure, walking the NoFap road is an amazing journey.
Have I personally noticed the increased attention when doing NoFap?…
….yes, I have!
Not a night and day difference for me, but a difference nevertheless.
Thanks for reading!
Other post you might find interesting…
- NoFap and dating / dating apps (good or bad?)
- Does NoFap make you more productive?
- What happens in your brain when you watch too much porn?
- Why is NoFap so hard?
- NoFap supplements
- How bad is relapsing on NoFap?