7 Ways To Get Rid Of Porn Cravings
Today's online porn is so stimulating for the brains reward system that it can impact the consumer in a very negative way.
Especially if we develop an addiction to it.
And let's face it, a lot of people have indeed done so.
So, let's say you have developed a mild addiction and you want to stop watching it, how do you get rid of cravings to watch porn?
Well, let's jump in and take a look at it…
Differentiate between porn cravings a normal horniness
First things first, you want to be able to distinguish between urges to watch porn and just being horny.
Why?
Well, because…
- One is caused by “sensitization”, screaming for you to engage in that bad habit (watch porn).
- The other is a natural and normal signal from your body for you to be intimate with someone.
Sensitization, is an addiction-related brain change that is formed when you repeatedly overuse something that gives you a lot of dopamine. It basically means that you ‘ve become very sensitive to triggers that remind you of that particular dopamine driven activity…
…in this case, fapping to porn!
To put it another way: sensitization is basically a “super memory” of pleasure. That super memory can fire up and give you powerful cravings to use when you see, or experience, something that reminds you of porn.
Natural urges, then we also have “natural urges”, i.e. horniness, which is completely normal.
Just like hunger is a signal from your brain to find some food, horniness is a signal from your brain to find a mate or to be close to someone.
I don't think that our goal should be to get rid of the latter. It's better to either use it for its purpose or redirect that energy into something else. More on this further down.
The porn cravings, however, are what we want to reduce as much as possible.
Now, granted, sometime there is an overlap between the two. Meaning, it is indeed possible for “real horniness” to make you want to seek out porn, but believe it or not, this is less common than you would think.
It might be more true in the beginning, when we first started using porn a few years back, but later on, as we have formed those sensitized pathways, it's a different matter.
Know the difference…
By being able to see the difference between real horniness and porn cravings you are already in a position of strength. This is good as you will have the upper hand when you try to implement the tools and tips I'm about to share with you.
Let's first take a closer look at some mental tools on how to get rid of porn cravings…
Recognize “the lie” and change your “meaning”…
When you get urges to watch porn, those sensitized pathways in your brain fire up and give you a “prediction” of how good it would be to act on them.
“Prediction” is another term for cravings and it is basically a mix of thoughts, feelings and images spinning around your head very quickly, all pointing towards how good it would be for you to watch porn and how that is the only right option for you at the time.
Your job is now to recognize it for what it is, a big fat lie!
Indeed it is a lie because, well, if overconsumption of porn can affect you in a negative way (which it obviously can) then following your cravings and acting on them can not be the right thing for you to do.
So, it's clearly a lie.
There are other, more specific, lies that your addiction voice can throw at you as well…
In addition to the “prediction”, there are other more specific lies your addiction can try to pull on you as well.
Some common lies the sensitized pathways were whispering in my ears, back when I was struggling with my own addiction, a few years ago could look something like this…
- Come on, just one last time, then I'll start a new life on Monday…
- Just a few more times wouldn't hurt, besides, everybody does it…
- It's normal…
- We're not going to relapse, just check “this one thing” quickly…
Now, your job is to become super aware of your inner voice, and recognize all the lies the sensitized pathways are whispering to you.
It takes some practice to become aware of the lies, but with a little effort you'll be able to do it fairly quickly.
For example, “it's normal”, is such a bad lie. Just because there's something out there that a lot of people are doing doesn't make it healthy, and you've already realized that your porn use is having a negative impact on you…
…so, it's clearly a big, fat, life.
Change the meaning…
If you want to get rid of urges to watch porn then you need to change the meaning porn has to you.
Realize that porn is not enhancing your life in any way whatsoever.
You shouldn't look at it as something enormously pleasurable that you have to give up and no longer get to use. You have to view it as something that is messing with your life, making you weaker and that you finally get to cut out of your life for good.
But what about all the sexual pleasure it delivers?
Now, some may still find it difficult to part from the idea that porn is bringing more sexual pleasure into their lives.
Well, if this is you, then realize that what porn is actually doing is desensitizing your reward system and rewiring your sexuality to become more turned on by pixels on a screen than by real life women. This, by the way, is also the reson behind porn induced ED (PIED).
How could something that robs you of the ability to become turned on by a flesh and blood person bring more sexual joy into your life?…
…think about that for a while.
Realize that, once you unhook from porn and the reward system in your brain becomes more sensitive again, you'll be getting so much more pleasure from day to day life than you could ever do if you have a messed up pleasure response.
Porn is not bringing more pleasure into your life. It actually robs you of day to day, real life, pleasure.
I realize that it may sound like I'm preaching and moralizing, and I don't mean to be, because believe it or not, I'm actually not “anti porn”…
…I'm just “pro-information”.
So, how to stop porn cravings?
Stop looking at it as a source of pleasure and start viewing it as something that robs you of the possibility of having a an awesome life.
For example, this is what porn did to me…
- It made my social anxiety skyrocket
- It made me lose my libido for real life women
- It gave me very weak erections
(I could barely get hard enough for real life sex, and I felt almost nothing). - It robbed me of motivation and drive
- It gave me anhedonia
(an inability to experience pleasure from day to day activities).
Sound's nice, huh?
Yeah, well, no! Far from it!
Once I started to view porn as something that was completely messing up my life, which it obviously was, then my cravings to watch it also reduced.
I started to look at the situation more like…
- I GET to stop using porn…
Instead of:
- I HAVE TO stop using porn…
I hope you see the difference there.
If you can manage this mindset shift, the urges to watch porn will automatically reduce.
Now, I'm not saying that this will completely get rid of your urges to watch porn, because it probably won't. But it will definitely take a lot of power out them, and you'll be getting the upper hand, for sure.
By the way, if you now are wondering how porn can make you depressed and lose motivation and drive, then take a look at a video I made a while back where I explain the mechanism of exactly that…
I hope you found the video informative.
Let's continue with more tools to help reduce your porn cravings.
I highly recommend you implement as many of them as possible as the combined effect is what may lead to you getting rid of your porn cravings for good…
… if not completely eliminated, then at least drastically reduced.
Have goals you keep working on…
When your trying to overcome an addiction, or even just stop a bad habit that is very powerful, it is absolutely crucial that you have some goals that you keep working on.
And by this I mean that the goal of quitting porn can, and should not, be your only goal.
Why?
Well, because…
…only trying to build your life around something that you want to get away from is not a productive way to go about it. It makes your life empty and, on top of this, it actually also increases your risk of failing with that one thing…even though that's the only thing you're trying to achieve.
What you focus on grows, and if your only focus is on NOT watching porn, then porn will soon become the only thing you're thinking about.
You can >>Download<< my Quit Porn Guide for FREE right now!
The solution…
You have goals that you want to move towards.
You should always have 2-3 goals that you keep working on. And one of those should be your main goal. Something that, if you were to achieve, would significantly improve your life.
Some examples of what my goals where during my own porn reboot…
- Be able to do 10 reps with 120kg – bench pressing (now achieved!)
- Start a side business (now achieved!)
- Keep working on that side business – having several sub-goals within it. (achieved my sub goals!)
- Have 45 cm biceps – arm circumference (now achieved!)
- Turn my side business into my main source of income instead of my day job (now achieved!)
- Leave my day job, which I hated with passion, that was killing my soul (now achieved!)
- Be free from porn – in a healthy body and mind – with a healthy libido, having strong erections again (now achieved!)
- Making my online business run so well that I can easily do it from wherever in the world I want to be (now achieved!)
Obviously I have been working on more than this over my years, but these were just some examples of the goals that meant a lot to me.
The point is, you should come up with your own goals. Something that resonate with you.
Then, keep working one them, one by one, all while you're also trying to give porn. Just remember to not set too many goals at once…
…building a better life takes time, so make it a marathon, not a sprint.
Here is where your natural urges enter the picture…
Remember when we talked about the difference between natural urges and your porn cravings? And how I alluded to the possibility of redirecting the energy one get from sexual urges?
Well, this is it!
When you're horny you have a lot of sexual energy in your body.
This may sound a bit strange, but I assure you, it is fully possible to learn how to redirect that energy into, for example, working on your goals.
Energy is energy…
Energy is energy and even though this may sound a bit “out there” I promise, there's nothing woo woo about it.
Look, have you ever planned to go for a run or lift weight later in the day, but once you came home from work you said something like:
“..oh man, I just can't bring myself to go for a run today, I'm totally out of energy” ?
Well, there you go!
Horniness increases your energy and if you then redirect your thoughts away from sex and towards achieving one of your goals, you can get a whole lot of work done that day, by riding on top of that energy.
This is called sexual transmutation.
Now, I'm not saying you have to use it like that. You can just as well use your horniness for what it's ment, i.e. engaging in some sexual activity with a real life person. I'm just pointing out that sexual transmutation can indeed be used to achieve your goals, should you so desire.
And, sexual transmutation is also a great tool to use for getting rid of porn cravings as well, should it be the case that real horniness (instead of porn cravings) makes you seek out porn sites.
Practical Tools And Tips
So far we have been talking a lot about your mindset and the psychology behind porn cravings, and since this is something that's not that concrete, perhaps you would be interested in some more hands on approaches, as well?
Okay!
Fair enough…
…let's take a look at a few more practical tools on how to get rid of porn urges.
Increase your intake of omega 3 fatty acids…
In the book Unchain Your Brain (check on Amazon), a book about overcoming addiction, there is one chapter where the brain experts, Daniel G. Amen and David E. Smith, talk about how getting more omega 3 in your diet can help with your impulse control.
They have even done studies on addicts specifically on this.
One study found that the addicts who had lower omega 3 levels had significantly more relapses on their road to recovery.
Pretty interesting, huh?
Since making sure to get enough omega 3 is both easy as well as healthy, this is a practical tip that is worth knowing.
Here are some foods that are rich in omega 3 fatty acids…
- Salmon
- Herring
- Oysters
- Walnuts
- Shrimp
- Chia seeds
- Flaxseeds
So make sure you include some of those the next time your writing your shopping list.
Of course you could also use a good omega 3 supplement, like I personally do.
“Okay, cool…but does this stop porn cravings?” You might ask…
Well, probably not. At best it will reduce your porn cravings a bit, but since getting a good amount of omega 3 fatty acids signficiantluy helps with impulse control, it is definitely worth a try.
Take a cold shower…
Nothing changes your state of mind quicker than jumping into an ice cold shower.
Unlike the other tips that take some time to start working, taking a cold shower can actually get rid of porn cravings within one minute.
In fact, it is THE fastest tool you can find for stopping porn cravings.
Granted, they are painful and they do take a lot of willpower to pull off, but I'm telling you, they can be a wonderful tool to have on your journey to stop using porn.
Cold showers elicit a bunch of bodily responses, but one of the more interesting ones is that they raise your dopamine levels. This is a good thing, since low levels of dopamine is one of the most common cause for getting porn craving in the first place.
Not only that, but cold showers also up-regulates your dopamine D2 receptors, making you get the dopamine benefits both instantly as well as long term. All in a healthy way…
…as opposed to instant gratification stuff, like eating junk food, gambling or watching porn.
How to take them…
I personally like to take my cold showers when I'm all done with washing myself. At the end of my normal shower, I just brace myself for the pain, turn the knob all the way to the coldest setting, and endure the suffering for 2-3 minutes.
Build it up…
However, I do not recommend you start with 2-3 minutes in your very first week.
Instead, only do it for a few seconds your very first time and then build from there. Perhaps you can do 10 seconds the following day, and then 20 seconds the day after that, and before you know it…
… you have discovered a new, powerful “urge killing tool” that you can add to your porn rebooting toolbox.
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Meditate…
Meditation is another wonderful tool for getting rid of urges to watch porn.
Now, they do not work as quickly as the cold showers, but they help you master the art of just noticing your urges without judging them, without feeding them and without following them.
This act of “just noticing”, without resisting, following, feeding or judging will make the porn cravings go away after a while.
In the addiction community this is called surfing the urges, and once you get the hang of it, it is extremely powerful.
Surfing the urges is like riding on top of the craving until it fades away, just like a surfer rides on top of a wave in the sea.
The idea is to not resist or try to push away the craving, because if you approach it like that the cravings always return after a while, with even more power than before you pushed them away. This is called the ironic rebound effect.
…but if you just ride on top of it, it will eventually die out and leave you alone for a good while.
Bonus tip: Consider Dopamine Discipline…
There is a phenomenal online course out there for guys who want to stop watching porn, called Dopamine Discipline.
It is created by a licensed therapist who has built the course on a revolutionary new HCT method (habit construction therapy).
It's a six week course that will give you everything you need in order to quit, but a big part the whole HCT method is that it is structured in a way that it actually eliminates most of your porn cravings.
Take a look at a short clip, in the video below, where I talk about it.
This is a short clip from a video on YouTube, where I often talk about the course as well…
You can click here to read other real user reviews and check current pricing
over at the Dopamine Discipline sales page.